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The Jitterbug

As a society, we are so hooked on caffeine that we are constantly finding new products to add it to. Some of the most bizarre caffeinated products currently on the market are:

Soap – Products like “Bath Buzz” contain 2400mg of caffeine in every bar. We guess this product is intended for those people who don’t have enough time to brew a morning cup. But mixing it with soap? What next? Morning caffeine toothpaste?

Oatmeal - Answering the question above, Sturm Foods has produced an warm breakfast cereal with a cup of coffee’s worth of caffeine. “Energy Instant Oatmeal” comes in three heart-racing flavours: cranberry apple, mixed berry and peach cobbler.

Inhaler – Yes, they’ve done it. Why bother drinking a mug of Columbian, when you can puff it back in less than a second. Buzzaire has created a puffer to blast 150mg of caffeine into your system with each depression. The manufacturer warns that no more than four doses are suggested in a 24-hour period.

But we’ve saved the best for last….

Pantyhose – Slim Fit 20 has a line of tights with sewn in caffeine microcapsules that release with body heat. The really alarming fact about this product is that the developers are trying to sell it as a weight-loss inducer. Somehow injecting caffeine into your legs will increase metabolism.

We Dare You To Keep Your Leg Still!

Our suggestion, avoid them all. The ONLY reason people need caffeine is to artificially stimulate wakefulness with increased adrenaline production. The only natural answer to daytime drowsiness is increased sleep at night. For those of you running on five hours each night, you are doing your body a daily disservice. Find the rest you need on a mattress from Simmons Mattress Gallery.

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